​Ahh, the joy of marriage!  You meet that special person that makes your heart (and maybe some other body parts) flutter.  You talk, you date, you get to know that other person inside and out, or so you think.  One day, there is a ring, a cermony, a joint checking account, maybe a pet or two.  Hopefully there is a house, maybe kids, possibly careers for the both of you.  Each year adds more opportunities, more challenges, more responsibilities.  Sometimes you argue, but mostly you agree, because you are in this for the long haul, right?  This is the person that you chose to spend the rest of your life with, yes?  'Til death do you part.  This is the person you rely on, to be your partner, to be your yang to your yin or your yin to your yang or whatever the situation.  The person you said you would come home to. Every night for the  r e s t  o f  y o u r  l i f e...

Every once in a while, not saying ALWAYS (actually I am), there comes a point where you question.  Who is this person again?  Why did I marry them instead of that other person?  How did I get here?  And next thing you know, you have that old Talking Heads song going around in your brain.  It happens.  It's normal.  If you didn't question your circumstances on a regular basis, you wouldn't be alive.  This is how we grow.  We question, we judge, we change based on those judgements and we GROW.  We become better. Our circumstances become better.  Because we were brave enough to question our current situation.  Question your choices.  It will be okay.

Usually (and hopefully) we end up reinforcing the fact that we made a good initial decision and it just needs a little tweaking or a new perspective.  Occasionally, and hopefully rarely, we sadly discover the decisions we made were not healthy for us long term.  Either way, the bottom line is, we examine, we take inventory, we discover what's still good and we get rid of (or get over) what is no longer good and is creating toxic situations in our lives.

Couples coaches can help you through those questions, those situations and help you make better choices for you and your significant other going forward.  A good couples coach will help you take an objective, non-judgemental look at where you both are, what you want for your future and what needs to be done to get there.  CRC Life Coach has ICF trained coaches that have been through it and have the tools and the experience to help you get through it for yourself.

Contact CRC Life Coach today to set up a free, no obligation appointment to discuss what you are going through and to see how we can help you both get through it.

​So this one’s for the guys today, the men out there that have a sneaking suspicion that they are getting older and that their body is not as resilient as it was 10, 15 or 20 years ago.  Shocker!  You are!  And it isn’t!
So why pick on the XY’s, rather than the XX’s.  Here’s why.

• Men are less likely to go to a doctor when they feel sick due to an inner perception that they are too busy.  Regardless of whether this is a true or false perception, men have a tendency to place a higher priority on “taking care of business” than they do on their own physical health despite the obvious contradiction of logic.
• Despite the jokes that are made (usually by women) about men being babies when they are sick, men generally are more “body blind”, meaning, they are less aware of their bodies when their bodies are trying to tell them that something is wrong.
• It is more socially acceptable, even expected, for men to “push through the pain” when their body is talking to them.
• Men are more likely to see illness as weakness and, therefore, unacceptable.
• Men are more likely to associate illness with getting older, and less competent which is also perceived as weakness (yes, we are not the most logical).  As before, we consider this unacceptable.

All of these patterns combine and are aggravated by the fact that men are at a generally higher risk than women for:

• Diabetes, due to their natural tendency to store fat in their bellies.
• High Cholesterol
• High Blood Pressure
• Heart disease
• Heart Failure
• Stroke
• Lung, colorectal and brain cancer
• Alcoholism (as a physiological disease, not a psychological dependence)

That said, although women are more likely to attempt suicide due to depression, men in the U.S. are 3.5 times more likely to actually die by suicide than women.  And then there are the male specific diseases like prostate cancer.
So why am I, as a coach, bringing all this up?  I am not a doctor, or a psychiatrist, psychologist or even a nurse.  In fact though, although coaching is not considered to be a health profession, it is definitely what is considered a helping profession.
Additionally, the motto of CRC Life Coach has always been “Making the world a better place, one life at a time”
As a coach, I am here to encourage, to support, and to help my clients to question their motives, and challenge their thoughts so that we can make better choices that take us to better, healthier, and happier places, one day at a time.
I encourage you and challenge you today, right now, my male counterparts, to start listening closer to your body, to hear what it is trying to tell you.  Stop paying attention to the toxic ideas society has taught us we need to be as men, question our own thoughts and do what it is right to live longer, healthier lives.  Not just for ourselves, but for our friends, our partners, our families.  And every day, make it better and better.

Russell